


Bridge to Nowhere

by Velocity_Owl87



Series: Loup!Verse [4]
Category: Hockey RPF
Genre: Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-11-14
Updated: 2011-11-14
Packaged: 2017-10-26 01:48:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 22,385
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/277262
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Velocity_Owl87/pseuds/Velocity_Owl87
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After a horrific betrayal, there needs to be much rebuilt between best friends Kaner and Tazer, but neither knows quite how to do it and both risk losing themselves in the attempt. Coupled with Tazer's guilt and Kaner's hurt, this task won't be easy, but no one is willing to give up. Least of all their friends.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Bridge to Nowhere

_Bridge to Nowhere_

 _“ Says you’re on a bridge to nowhere,_

 _And you’re getting there fast, put it in the past_

 _If this is a race then I hope you come last.” Sam Roberts_

  _Western Enclave, Winter Solstice_

           Jonathan Roy sat across from Ryan Miller, the2nd Consort of the Western Pack and tried to not flinch when those clear green eyes studied him ever so slowly and carefully. He hated to admit it, but being alone with the ruthless Alpha that the 2nd Consort was starting to become made him extremely nervous. It wasn’t that Ryan had turned nasty or unpleasant in any way, but all of them were slowly becoming aware of exactly how sharp a political mind was hidden behind that innocuous and calm exterior that Miller always presented as part of the Western Triumvirate.

And of course, there was still that faint touch of awkwardness at the fact that they were sire and pup and neither of them really cared to dwell on _that_ little tidbit overmuch. Even though it was a done deal between them, they never could quite get away from the base knowledge of it. Especially when they were alone together. Now _that_ was an extremely rare occurrence between them, since despite being consort to one of the heir presumptive, Jonathan and Patrick Sharp hadn’t usually been at Court.

But the clash between the Western heir and the Mid-western pack had changed all of that and their presence was more prominent than it had been in the past.

“I’m sorry, Jonathan, to be pulling you into service at this time, but our power base is in trouble and we can’t afford to appear weak to anyone.” Ryan finally spoke, breaking the silence that had fallen between them ever since Jonathan had arrived in the Western Enclave. Ryan sighed and rubbed at his forehead tiredly, drawing Jonathan’s notice to the sharpness of his features and the lines of pain that seemed permanently etched around the 2nd Consort’s lower lip.

Jonathan shrugged. It had been a hard autumn for the pack, what with the Alpha being relocated to the Eastern Pack territory and Jose having to sign a formal permission from the Mid-Western pack and with Miller himself out in Buffalo...the power structure was weakened and Jonathan knew it was only a matter of time until other packs came in to the territory. And as much as he hated to even _think_ it...they needed a strong enough Alpha _in situ_ until something more permanent could be figured out.

“I understand that. But what exactly do you want me to do in this situation?” Jonathan asked, not wanting to draw out what was clearly a painful situation for Miller. No one liked to admit that they needed help and for an Alpha that emotion was literally doubled.

“Ideally? For you to convince Sharpie to accept the title and be the Western Alpha with you as his consort,” He paused and his eyes shifted to their original dark brown before going green again. “But I suspect that would be impossible, even with your support thrown behind the idea.”

Jonathan smiled slightly and shook his head. “Sharpie’s got his hands full at the moment and even if he didn’t...the neutrality is far too ingrained in him to ever give it up. And I’ve seen enough of the politics involved in running a court to last me a lifetime. There’s no way that I would, even if it was for the greater good of the pack. My father was the Kingmaker and I don’t intend to follow in his footsteps.”

Ryan inclined his head in acquiescence at Jonathan’s words.  He had expected for the younger Roy to say as much and he had to admit that although it was inconvenient, he would have lost respect for the younger Roy if the reply had been different.

“So if you can’t have what you really wanted...what exactly can I be of help with at this time?” Jonathan asked tactfully.

“I need a neutral envoy to check up on the Heir Presumptive and his Charge. They’ve more or less disappeared and at this time...we can’t afford to have the Heir break. We either need him back here, or for him to give an official resignation and name the next candidate so Regency can be set up.” Ryan explained.

“So it’s just...a visit then? Nothing more? No diplomatic manoeuvres involved here?” Jonathan asked, his voice mild, but still with a hint of sharpness underneath the words.

Ryan tilted his head and smiled faintly. “If we needed a diplomatic envoy, I wouldn’t be asking you to do it. Besides, Towes is a paranoid fucking mess at the moment. I don’t want to either provoke or scare him into a deeper hiding place at the moment. You’re the best choice for the job. Now do you accept the task or not?”

Jonathan chewed on his lip before he gave a curt nod as his answer. He too was worried about Tazer and even though they hadn’t been extremely close friends...there was still warmth and mutual respect between them. Even now, when Tazer had almost become a recluse alongside Kaner, both parties kept the bond going. Through emails and phone calls and texts, but it was still there. No visits were possible, since Kaner was still convalescing and Tazer...

“How soon do you want this done?”  Jonathan asked, not wanting to think about Tazer’s raw and fragile state at the moment and hoping that he wouldn’t do anything to aggravate it when he visited.

“I need an answer within the week.” Ryan replied. “I know of your friendship with both of them and I am not as mercenary as to exploit it for my gain. But the pack is in danger at the moment and...” he trailed off and his eyes flashed to opaque silver before he continued. “Toews needs to face up to the responsibility, no matter how hellish doing it might be.”

Jonathan swallowed hard at the pronouncement. Even though it had been delivered in a soft and understanding tone, it was still a harsh indictment of what had occurred almost two months ago in Minnesota. 

The sad thing was that it was true. No one could deny that Kaner’s current state was more or less Tazer’s fault. And the current power vacuum in the West was an indirect result of it as well.

“You will have your answer within the week and a new Alpha within two weeks.” Jonathan promised forcefully as he got out of his chair and bowed his respects to the 2nd Consort.

“Thank you.” Ryan whispered, gratefully inclining his head in return acknowledgement before Jonathan straightened up and left the room.

Ryan watched him go and although he felt a twinge of pity at what he had asked Jonathan Roy to do, he had to do something to save the pack that was the life work of his Alpha. Lives depended on it.

That was what mattered at this point in time. There was simply no other choice any longer.

~*~*~*~*~

“What did they ask of you?” Patrick Sharp asked his mate the minute that Jonathan had returned to their room in the Enclave. Jonathan had only smiled tersely at the question as he unlaced his boots and kicked them off into the closet before padding over to the bed where Sharpie lay reading some fantasy novel that he was addicted to at that time.

“Basically to visit Tazer and Kaner and ask whether Tazer intends to be the heir and if not, to step aside so Regency can be set in place.” Jonathan replied as he lay down next to Sharpie, who quickly tossed the paperback aside and wrapped his arms around his mate.

“Is the pack in that much danger?”  Sharpie asked worriedly, his arms tightening around Jonathan as he spoke.

“Mhhmm. The Alpha is in Hershey and more than likely will end up in Maryland, if all the signs are correct. The 1st Consort is in St. Paul and the 2nd is in Buffalo and two of them are weakened enough already, being pulled so far from their homelands. They need an Alpha in the territory and it needs to be done fast.” Jonathan replied, summing up almost an hour conversation in a few succinct sentences.

Sharpie growled, but didn’t offer a comment. They both knew that the situation could be remedied if he simply accepted the post and left Tazer and Kaner to their own devices. But Sharpie couldn’t go back on his family’s legacy anymore than he already had and as much as he cared and respected his captain...part of him was furious at what had been allowed to happen to Kaner.

Yes, he had age and experience behind him to see why Tazer would have thought he was doing the right thing at the time. But he had shown serious flaws in trusting an unknown Alpha and not bothering to force accords until it was almost too late. And Kaner had been the one to pay too high a price for Tazer’s ambition.

Sharpie cared about Tazer...but he wasn’t ready to forgive him just yet. Nor would he sacrifice his family’s long standing values to ease the burden of responsibility that Tazer had to bear.

“I wish we’d never gone out that night,” Sharpie finally said, breaking the silence that had fallen between them after Jonathan had spoken. Jonathan burrowed himself deeper into Sharpie’s chest until his head was slotted neatly under his mate’s chin before he replied

“Me too. Me too.”

Sharpie sighed and just held Jonathan closer. There wasn’t anything else to be said. No matter which way they looked at it, everything had been fucked six ways till Sunday and they had no choice but to suck it up and find the best solution under the circumstances that was all.

~*~*~*~

Patrick Kane sat in the comfortable, overstuffed armchair and listlessly watched as the snow swirled and skittered around the Chicago streets. It was too early to get up and too late to go back to sleep. Nightmares had done their job and yanked him out of much desired sleep and left him sweaty and panting with a scream locked behind his teeth and an entire morning of emptiness until Tazer woke up.

He could have taken the easy way out and simply woken Tazer up to keep him company and to comfort him. Maybe even convince Tazer to crawl into bed with him and get some sleep that both of them badly needed.

But he didn’t. Despite knowing that Tazer would rouse himself and do his best to ease the nightmares and memories back into the past where they belonged, he didn’t. Patrick couldn’t bear to see the faint flash of guilt and sadness in the depths of Tazer’s soft dark eyes whenever they looked at him. Or how Tazer always held him like fragile crystal. Or worse, how he wouldn’t look Kaner straight in the eye anymore.

It hurt worse than living with the memories and the nightmares, so he had slowly stopped waking Tazer up. He knew it was unhealthy, keeping it all to himself, but he would much rather sit and stare out the window to tame his demons than face Tazer’s guilt constantly.

All he wanted was for them to move away from what happened in Minnesota. To get better so that he could play again. To be next to his Captain and trade stupid jokes and win together. To have Tazer look at him like he used to, rather than with the pity and sadness which seemed like they were the only two emotions that were attached to Patrick in Tazer’s mind.

He didn’t want to be frozen forever as the broken victim. But Tazer wasn’t listening, no matter how he tried to tell him.

He closed his eye and tried to not let his unhappiness overwhelm him. But it was hard. Extremely hard and he didn’t know if there was any possible way out.

So he simply pulled the quilt closer to his body with his right hand and continued watching the snow until morning broke and Tazer made his way towards him and wrapped his arms around him in a loose embrace, neither of them speaking as the snow fell.

~*~*~*~

 _“Another day breaks and the last one’s gone._

 _You dig deep just to carry on.” Sam Roberts_

 _European Collective Enclave_

“So what are we going to do about the Western Pack?” Henrik asked Ovechkin softly as they compiled the data that they had just received from Hemsky and Smid and had been corroborated by Hiller in the Pacific and Rask in the Eastern Seaboard. Basically, the Western Pack, the oldest independent pack in the Prairies was up for grabs and only the formality of the accords was giving them breathing room. But once that period was observed...

Ovechkin frowned as he chewed on his bottom lip and rapidly typed in some more blocks of information before saving it and looking up at his counterpart.

“What do _you_ think we should do about it?” Ovechkin asked calmly as he placed his elbow on the table and rested his chin in his palm. Henrik blinked at how it had all been turned back on him and he had to stop and think about what his answer would be. Personally, he was all for staying neutral about the situation. His country would gain nothing by colonizing another pack and his people weren’t interested in territory or new mouths to feed. Only alliances and open trade routes. That was all.

There were also the undeniable facts that if it hadn’t been for the Western Alpha and his willingness to forge alliances and in the end, risk himself and his consorts for the well-being of the young and the mates of other Alphas...he was sure he would have died of a broken heart.  He chanced a glance up at Ovechkin and knew that he wouldn’t have been the only one.

He was sure though, that he would have kept his sanity. Ovechkin, he was sure, would have lost his mind if his precious Nicky hadn’t pulled through after everything that the captives had been put through. His mouth unconsciously tightened as he thought about his own mate. Although Sid was strong and resilient, there was a part of him that had been broken that night and no matter how much time and how much healing he did, it would always remain tender and not quite the same as before.

“We’d be traitors if we went in. If it wasn’t for the Alpha, we’d have lost too much and our debt isn’t one that will ever be completely paid off.” Henrik replied quietly. Ovechkin’s eyes narrowed and he nodded his agreement.

“Nicky could have died, if we hadn’t gotten there in time. “ Ovechkin stated flatly. His eyes widened and Henrik saw that they were more silver than their usual winter blue. “I won’t poach his lands or their wolves. Not when they nearly died to save the Consorts and our society from exposure.”

Henrik nodded. He had expected that much of an answer. Especially since he suspected that Ovechkin was the more traumatized of the two when it came down to it. Nicky had healed, or as much as he would, but Ovechkin had gained a weak-point only visible to those that had known him for long enough. The threat of losing his mate had caused it and for as long as they lived, it wouldn’t ever go away.

“Send our decision to Smid and Rask and counsel them to remain as they are and to keep reporting as per the agreement.” Ovechkin advised Henrik.

“And what happens when either the Heir or the Regency is announced?” Henrik queried.

“We’ll cross that bridge when we get to it. But I have a sneaking suspicion that despite everything, Regency will be more likely to be set up rather than the Heir taking his position. Toews has lost his ambition and his will and unless something drastic happens...we’re going to be looking at a new Incumbent.” Ovechkin clarified calmly.

Henrik nodded. He had suspected as much. He hadn’t seen Toews after what was being referred to as “The Minnesota incident” by the packs, but from what had been reported to the Collective; Tazer was as fucked up as Kaner. “It makes sense. I will contact them and let them know their orders. You will contact the Alpha of our decision then?”

Ovechkin nodded and both men bent back to their tasks.

 _Chicago_

Adam shuffled nervously as he stood in front of Tazer’s door. Even though most of him really wanted to be there, part of him wanted to just make his excuses and run. Despite having (albeit limited) physical contact with Tazer and communication (albeit stilted) with Kaner, he was dead sure that there was something seriously wrong with them. The others had chalked it up to trauma and had respectfully kept their distance. Management had consented to Tazer’s requests for an absence for himself and Kaner and had respected his wishes to be contacted by email or phone calls unless face to face meetings were an absolute necessity.

The rest of the team hadn’t understood why Tazer and Kaner had withdrawn so forcefully from everyone, but he and Sharpie weren’t about to enlighten them. It simply couldn’t be explained to them, nor was it their place to do so either. All they knew was the bullshit story that had been fed to everyone not _loup_ : Kaner and Tazer had been out on the town in St. Paul and had ended up being the victims of random violence at a nightclub.

There weren’t too many details out afterwards since Tazer was deemed to be in shock over the brutal beating of Kaner. No charges could be filed and when Kaner and Tazer had been released from the hospital, they had flown back to Chicago and done their best to disappear from the public eye. This had left everyone stunned and the Blackhawks PR scrambling to cover everything else that could possibly be questioned by any media, reputable or not.

Adam was also sure that the packs had something to do with it, since the Midwestern pack was paranoid as fuck and would for sure dissuade anyone from poking their noses into something that had to be kept under wraps.  And he was sure that once everyone gave them stony silence on the matter, the cops and the media would drift off to get interested in the next shiny and horrific thing to pop up on their radars.

 The world had moved on and Adam was trying to also, since it seemed that Tazer and Kaner wanted exactly that. But he couldn’t let it go. Not to mention that no matter how close he and Sharpie were to each other; neither could find the way to bring up what was clearly a raw subject. Things had changed too much, yet neither _loup_ had figured out a way to cope and move on just yet. So it stayed between them as they fought to put on a semblance of normalcy for a leaderless and bewildered team, league and as far as he knew...families.

Kane’s family had called him up wondering if he could do something about their baby boy’s distance. They hadn’t seen him since Minnesota and he had refused to visit or have them visit him. It hadn’t been one of the best days of Adam’s life when he had received the phone call from Kaner’s parents asking him to check on their little boy and to verify with his own eyes that their son was fine. They desperately needed that knowledge, even if it was a second hand version, but _they had to know_.

He had always been a bit of a sap and Adam had to admit that was another reason why he was at Tazer’s door, trying to muster up the courage to knock on the door and get that visit over and done with. As much as he was concerned about Tazer and Kaner, he was willing to let them have their distance to get over the shock and approach them only when they were ready to rejoin the world and start living again. But hearing a mother’s quietly resigned voice laced with barely held back tears asking him to keep an eye on a surely lost son was clearly too much for Adam to take and he had agreed.

Reminding himself of his duty, Adam ran his fingers through his hair, muttered a quiet prayer under his breath and knocked on the door.

He waited for awhile, but got no answer. He tried again after a full minute had passed, knocking much more forcefully this time. He didn’t pause in the knocking until he heard locks being turned and stopped only just in time, since he only just missed hitting Jonathan in the face when he flung the door open. He smiled at Jonathan, who could only manage one of his weird little half-smiles in return before he reached out and embraced Jonathan, giving him a small lick on the side of the neck as per his pack’s custom.

Jonathan stiffened, but didn’t pull back and sort of eased his lanky body into the greeting until they broke apart and Adam entered the house.

“What are you doing here?” Jonathan asked flatly as he locked the door behind Adam, who was now taking off his shoes and leaving them on the large mat that covered the entrance. 

Adam raised an eyebrow at the blunt question and Tazer had the grace to blush when he realized how rude he actually sounded when he spoke. He cleared his throat and tried again.

“It’s not that I don’t appreciate you coming by...but...” he trailed off and ran his hands through hair that was almost jaw length and not a usual look for the usually conservatively groomed Captain. It was also fairly stringy looking and greasy and that, alongside the pasty white skin, chapped lips and hollows under the high cheekbones were enough to make Adam’s reservations completely disappear.

Jonathan bit his lip before he sighed heavily and attempted a wobbly smile that made him look like he was grimacing in pain, completely failing in its intended purpose. Adam could tell that despite the awkward facade, Jonathan was completely at a loss at what to do and his sudden appearance was still unclassified as either an aid or a hindrance, but if Adam didn’t take matters into his own hands soon, that would change in a hurry.

“Tazer, stop that. You look like you’re going to hurt yourself there. You going to offer me anything to drink or did you forget that much of your famous Canadian manners?” Adam asked in his usual tactless manner.

That was the right thing to say, judging by the way Tazer’s face went back to normal and he moved towards the kitchen area with a quietly amused Adam following right behind him. Adam settled himself in a chair and watched as Tazer dumped out the old coffee and started to brew a new pot. Although he was silent, his movements were fluid and loose, not jerky or abrupt. Adam let out a soft sigh of relief at those non-verbal signs that Tazer had already made his decision and his task would be made easier now than he had expected.

“What’s up?” Tazer asked once he had gotten the coffee maker sorted out and it was softly brewing away the one precious fluid that was to werewolves what catnip was to cats on some levels. He leaned against the counter and fixed Adam with that unfathomable stare of his as he crossed his arms across his chest and waited for Adam to tell him the reason for his visit.

Adam only raised an eyebrow and countered with “You tell me. Most people don’t take their best friend and hide out from the world without a damned good reason. What’s yours?”

Tazer’s eyes widened, and for a minute his expression was rueful before it switched to neutral. But it was too late, Adam considered that a victory and decided to keep on pushing the advantage, however small it was, that he had gotten with that small action.

Tazer looked down and opened and closed his mouth a few times as he tried to put whatever it was into words. Finally, he looked up and scowled at Adam, who was now leaning back in his chair watching him go through the steps with faint amusement writ large all over his face. This made Tazer scowl darkly at him before he sighed heavily.

“You’re enjoying this too much. “He finally grounded out, making Adam snicker.

He bit his lip before he took a deep breath and finally answered the original question.

“Kaner’s not getting better and I don’t know how the fuck to fix him. I broke him and now I can’t fix him.” Tazer admitted so bitterly that it surprised Adam.

“What do you mean? Didn’t you turn him?” Adam asked slowly. Tazer snorted.

“Yeah, I did when he woke up. I figured it was the least I could do after getting him so fucked up that he’d never go back to playing again.” Tazer answered in the same bitter tone. “But it didn’t work. At least not the way I’ve seen and heard at any rate.”

Adam tilted his head at that. “You mean it didn’t heal him?”

Tazer shook his head. “Not the way it was supposed to.” He sighed, a deep shuddering exhale of breath before he pressed his hands to his eyes briefly and hard enough to leave red marks before he turned his now pink-rimmed gaze towards Adam.

“It’s almost as if he’s human, Bur. He changes with the cycles, but he doesn’t heal. He’s the weakest _loup_ that any of the packs have known...I damned him once out of pride. Now I’ve damned him again out of necessity. And still...I’ve fucked up and there’s no way to fix him. None at all.”

~*~*~*~

 _“I'd go there if you let me,  
they're never gonna find me now  
My life is always empty  
and in and out of doubt” Neverending White Lights_

After Tazer’s confession, Adam wouldn’t have been anymore surprised if a bomb exploded in the kitchen. Yes, he was new to the whole _loup_ thing, but even he knew that Kaner’s situation was _not_ normal. They all gained the closest thing that they could to invincibility when they were turned and to hear that someone was almost the same as they had been before was downright horrifying.

It was also, to some extent, proof of a borderline Alpha. And a borderline Alpha wouldn’t be accepted when it came to taking over the throne of the oldest free holding in North America. He had gotten that much knocked into him during the crash courses of _loup_ society that Morrow, Lehtonen and a few others had managed to cobble together whenever they had the time. This was really bad. In fact, it was worse than he had ever suspected, since he had just assumed that things weren’t okay because Tazer was still holding off on turning Kaner. But now that it had come out...

Adam straightened up in his chair and leaned forward on the table to look at Tazer, who had wrapped his arms around his middle and was standing hunched forward. It was almost as if someone had knocked the wind out of him and it was hurting him badly to get his breath back. Or worse yet, as if he had broken so thoroughly that it was all he could do to keep the fragments of his self together.

The sight was so heart-rending to Adam that it was all he could do to keep himself in his chair rather than getting up and gathering the young pup in his arms and offering him the small relief of his embrace. The only thing keeping him in his chair was that if he did approach Tazer like that, there was a very good possibility that Tazer would freeze and never let him back inside again. Yes, he was younger and right now was nothing more than a deeply hurt and traumatized boy, but Adam wouldn’t let himself simply think of him in that way. The steel will and iron resolve was still there. He was still his captain and a Born Alpha (an Alpha was still an Alpha, he had learned. The designation didn’t matter. Alphas were the pinnacle of their society and that was the end of it all) and the Heir presumptive to another pack. He may want to comfort a friend, but in the end, he had to respect both protocols and the _loup_ himself.

It wasn’t that Tazer wasn’t in touch with his emotions. He was simply more subdued and seemed even more so when he was surrounded by people like Kaner, Duncs, Sharpie and even himself. Or that he didn’t know how to handle them when they came up. It was just that he was so private and so careful of what he let show and with whom that it was hard to not know when to approach and when to pull away from him unless verbally indicated.

Dimly, Adam wondered if it was part of their dual nature that had made him like that, or if it would have always been that way with Tazer. Either way, he was keeping his distance and focusing on finding a logical and rational solution to the problem at hand. Emotions would have to wait for Kaner or someone more experienced to handle. He wasn’t going to go there, since he knew that he had the emotional wherewithal of a twelve year old boy.

“Is there anything that can be done?” Adam finally asked in the quiet kitchen, the only sound being that of the coffee machine hissing softly as it kept the coffee warm.

Tazer bit his lip and shrugged a sharp up and down motion of his shoulders that once again emphasized the raw youth that he still possessed and that Adam himself had somehow lost along the way. It made Adam inwardly flinch again, but he forced none of his internal turmoil to bleed through.

“I’ve been looking. Old records, archives, fairy-tales, legends. Anything that could give me a clue, but nothing’s giving me an answer.” Tazer admitted sullenly, his voice holding almost a trace of whining desperation that made Adam wince just a bit.

 _“Christ. He really must be at his wit’s end if he let himself sound like that in front of me,”_ Adam thought, especially since in normal circumstances they both knew that it would provide ammo for any later teasing that would occur. But Adam didn’t think that he would be doing much of that any time soon. This was too fucking serious for him to be taking ammunition for cheap shots later on.

“Where have you been getting your information?” Adam asked in a calm voice, hoping to steer him from the incipient hysteria that was building up in his friend.

“The Western Enclave mostly, since my family pack has been part of the Western pack since the HBC sent traders out here.” He rubbed his forehead and sighed. “If I can’t find anything useful here, then I’ll figure out a way to get something from the Eastern Enclave and the European Collective.I’m sure that I can pull rank or favours to get stuff. There has to be something! Anything that can tell me what to do! Surely this has happened before.”

Adam nodded at this. “And what if you can’t find anything? What if he’s the first and last of his kind?” he asked his friend, his voice low and gentle in an effort to take the sting out of what he was asking of Tazer.

“ _No_.” Tazer shook his head violently, his eyes going deep amber when he growled out the word. “ _No._ I _will_ find an answer. I _will_ fix him. And everything will be back to normal. Just like it’s supposed to be!” the words were almost incomprehensible as Tazer growled them out and Adam was almost sorry that he had to play Devil’s Advocate when Tazer was so emotionally distraught. But he had to make his friend understand that despite the lengths he would want to go to, there was always the possibility that it simply _couldn’t_ be done. And he had to accept that failure as well as his guilt and remorse over Kaner.

Adam raised his hands, palms up in surrender and Tazer’s eyes bled out a bit of colour at the gesture. Tazer scrubbed at his hair and winced at the texture before he turned to the coffee pot and started to methodically prepare two mugs of the coffee that had been burbling quietly as they had their conversation.

“I’m sorry.” He mumbled as he poured out coffee and half and half into the mugs. “I know that there could be that possibility. I know it and I dread it fiercely. But I just...” he trailed off as he leaned over and gripped the counter hard to ground himself in the conversation and to enable him to anchor himself as he spoke the next horribly painful words out loud. He took a deep breath before he looked at Adam, showing him wide, silver eyes as he did so.

“I know he loves me. I know that I’m his hero. I knew it all before any of this happened. I knew it and I never said anything to him either way. I let him hope that things could be different than they were before. I hurt him so much, Bur. I gutted him, from the inside out.”

His face crumpled up and he started to cry, rough, violent and harsh sobs that shook his entire body so much that he nearly doubled over as he cried.

Adam only wasted a few seconds in shock before he rushed over to Tazer and enfolded him in an embrace that Tazer sank into gratefully. His hands twisting themselves into Adam’s shirt as he held on for dear life as he sobbed painfully into Adam’s shoulder.

“It’s okay. It’s okay. I got you, kid. I got you. I got you...” Adam kept up this whispering litany, gently rubbing Tazer’s back in an effort to soothe him and calm him down.  His entire world had narrowed down to getting Tazer to cry out some of the pain so he could maybe start trying to heal his wounds and he supposed that was the reason why he didn’t hear the light footsteps until it was too late.

He looked up and felt as if he was frozen when he saw Kaner, frail, pale and still wrapped in bandages and gauze standing in the doorway, his one visible eye blazing silver as took in the scene in front of him.

“What the hell did you to Tazer?”

~*~*~*~

Danny Briere had just finished making himself a sandwich and had just put all the ingredients away back into the fridge when his laptop beeped at him. He sighed, but that didn’t make him move any faster. Instead, he rolled his eyes and dug into the fridge for the last carton of orange juice. He was hungry; everyone and everything else could wait until he got his blood sugar up. Once he found it, he put it on the counter and closed the fridge, careful to write “juice” on the whiteboard shopping list before moving away to gather up his dinner and move into the living room.

He put the plate and carton down on his desk before he looked at who was being annoyingly insistent at this time of night. After all, he knew for sure that there wasn’t a family emergency on the horizon. He had spoken to his family earlier and had been reassured that everything had been fine. He didn’t think it was any of his forum or gaming buddies, since they knew he wasn’t on Mondays or Wednesdays for World of Warcraft.

Frowning, he clicked open the dialogue box and was surprised to see a rumpled looking Nicklas Backstrom staring at him through his webcam. A pencil was haphazardly stuck through his hair and he looked as jittery as fuck. In the background, Danny could see stacks of books and cans and cans of Redbull and Monster; which explained why despite looking like death warmed over, Nicky seemed to be vibrating. Danny had to blink at the sight a couple of times, since he wasn’t used to getting messages from other _loups_ , never mind archivist _loups._

“Briere? Are you there? I really need to talk with you.” Nicklas enunciated carefully, despite his expression giving away his irritation at being kept waiting.

“Yeah! Yeah! I’m here. Something wrong?” Danny asked worried that they were facing yet another great war that he honestly didn’t want any part of. He wasn’t born _loup_ and most of the time, he would have much rather pretended that part of his nature didn’t exist at all. He was quite content to stay on the fringes and focus on his career, his family and his hobbies. But when all three of his boys had been born _loup_ , he had seen the writing on the wall and hadn’t objected (much) when he, Pominville and Letang had been made the archivists of the Eastern Pack.

He didn’t mind the work much and the geek in him enjoyed reading and indexing some of the weirdest stories that had been put down. And on the plus side, he was learning skills that would more than likely help once his career had reached its logical conclusion. Yes, he was a _loup_ , but even their preternatural bodies had limits. And he had a family to think about also, so it all worked out for him.

 Backstrom shook his head and he blushed bright enough for Danny to see through the webcam.

“No war this time. No. I need your help though.” Backstrom was quick to assure him. Ever since the November Civil War, communication was encouraged and strict protocols were installed to make sure that contact was being established and maintained for mostly pack business. Personal conversations weren’t frowned upon, but not as actively encouraged.

“With what, exactly? I’m not really a field agent.” Danny pointed out as he sat down and pulled a pen and pad of paper closer to take notes on what exactly Backstrom might need for him to look at.

“I am well aware of that, since I haven’t heard Ovie mention seeing you out there quite often.” Backstrom returned dryly, making Danny grin a bit. He hadn’t expected for the introverted mate of the loud and brash Ovechkin to actually have a dry sense of humour and he had to admit that it made the young Swede more endearing to him.

“What can I help you with then?” Danny asked as he grabbed his sandwich and took a large bite out of it. Backstrom smiled at him before he replied.

“I need all the records that the East has that cover healing, metamorphosis and Omegas. Anything, no matter how small, would be very useful indeed.” Backstrom explained as he pulled out the pencil in his hair and started playing with it, weaving it and flicking rapidly between his hands and fingers. He was doing it so fast and so gracefully that it was nearly making Danny dizzy.

“I don’t know if I can _just_ give you that kind of information. I’d have to clear it with the Regent and the Alpha first.” Danny answered slowly once he had swallowed down his food, put the rest of the sandwich down and surreptitiously wiped his hands with a tissue. Yes he was hungry, but he wasn’t going to be eating in the face of such a seemingly grey area request.  It wasn’t as if he was a major stickler for the rules. Nor did he really have to double-check on whether he had clearance to those records or not. Once he had been named the Chief Archivist, he had been given free reign of the Pack’s records and it had become his responsibility to clean them up, transfer the information to a data base and back-up the files. And with what seemed like an army of temps, had done it in less than five years. It was his domain, but it never hurt to be careful.

Backstrom made a face before he searched through the piles of papers scattered all over his desk before he pulled up what looked like a diplomatic request. Danny recognized the heavy champagne colour of the parchment and even with the grainy quality of the webcam, he could see the seal and the signature of approval for the request. He laughed softly to himself at the sight. Touché, the pup knew what he was about when he made those kinds of requests. But then, he was Swedish. Expedience and practicality was basically a national trait.

“The Kingmaker gave me permission to make the request after I received a similar request from his son. It took a lot of digging and asking around, but I managed to compile records from the Baltic and Slavic states in the collective.” Backstrom explained with the glee reserved only for archivists and librarians everywhere when they had managed to wrestle information for an interested patron.

 “Ah. Fair enough. But why would Jonathan Roy be making those requests?” Danny asked while he himself wondered if he had missed something somewhere along the lines of communication. He also made a mental note to maybe get out and interact more with his fellow pack members at some point.

Backstrom’s face went sombre at the question. “It’s for the Heir and his Charge. Other than that, I was not given the particulars. I apologize. But can you locate the information?”

 Backstrom asked, as he pinched the bridge of his nose before rubbing his eyes tiredly. That was a gesture all too familiar to Danny and it was mostly done when the caffeine simply had stopped working and adding more wasn’t going to help the situation.

“It won’t be a problem. But when do you need it by?” Danny asked as he shoved his sandwich away and started making notes on what Backstrom was asking for.

“Would two days be enough time?” Backstrom asked hopefully, his eyes shining brightly in his tired, puffy face as he spoke. Danny wanted to say yes, since the look that the younger wolf was giving him was reminiscent of the look his own children gave him when they were begging for something that they knew was impossible, but were willing to try to get it either way. He sighed, since he knew that it would take him at least that much time to get the correct data, then to compile it in neat categories for readability.

“I can ‘ave it in four days at the earliest. Maybe a week at the latest. I’m sorry, but I cannot do it any faster than that.” Danny apologized as he scribbled the reminder down. Backstrom sighed, but nodded his agreement.

“That is fine. I know the time-frame was too much to ask for. I appreciate it all the same and thank you for helping me.” Backstrom thanked him in that stiff, slightly cold Norse way that for the life of him, he could never fully get used to.

“It is no problem. I just ‘ave one question...why are you doing this for the Kingmaker’s son? I thought that you would stay out of this all, being an archivist and a European wolf.” Danny asked, not wanting to be rude, but clearly curious as to why Backstrom would be going through so much effort to gather up all the information for the Heir of the Western Packs and his Charge.

Backstrom made a face as if he was sucking a lemon before he finally answered in a low voice.

“They saved my life. The Alpha and the 1st Consort did not have to, but they saved my life and the lives of my friends. It’s a debt I can never repay, but I can at least try.”

Danny nodded. He understood all about owing such a debt. Carbonneau would never call it in, but Danny wouldn’t ever forget it.

“I’ll have it for you as soon as I can. Go to bed.” Danny ordered him, his smile easing the sting of his command and making Backstrom smile and look his age.

“I will do that. Good night and thank you.” Danny only had just enough time to return the greeting before Backstrom logged off.

Danny sat back in his chair and looked at his sandwich. Better eat first before he got mired in archiving hell.

~*~*~*~

 _“Hey I found the safest place to keep all our tenderness.  
Keep all those bad ideas. Keep all our hope.  
It's here in the smallest bones, the feet and the inner-ear.  
It's such an enormous thing to walk and to listen.” The Weakerthans_

Kaner sat at the table, sipping the coffee that was meant to be for Tazer when Adam returned from putting Tazer into bed. He didn’t react when his friend and former team-mate grabbed the other mug and sank exhaustedly in the chair next to him. They sat in silence, sipping the milky sweet coffee until Kaner spoke.

“How is he?” he asked quietly. It took Adam a bit to respond, since he was reeling from both Tazer’s breakdown and Kaner’s changed demeanour and appearance. Although he was usually fast on his feet, this was taking him awhile to absorb and deal with properly.

“He’s sleeping. It wore him out, all of that crying.” Adam replied tersely. Kaner nodded.

“He’s been really pushing himself on that project of his...and trying to decide if he’s going to be the Alpha of the West...and taking care of me. I guess it finally caught up to him.” He looked down at the half-full mug thoughtfully before he turned his gaze to Adam. His lower lip trembled just for a few seconds before he bit down on it and spoke to Adam.

“I’m glad that you came, Bur. He’s not well...and he won’t listen to me...and I don’t know who else to-” Adam put his cup down and stifled a sigh before he reached over and pulled Kaner into a hug. He held on tightly, despite being alarmed at how fragile and birdlike he felt in his arms. Even though both Kaner and Tazer were usually fairly sinewy, both of them now were fairly close to being simply skin and bones.

That realization was enough to make guilt crest up in him. He hadn’t come a moment too soon. Both of them were wasting away, one out of sheer guilt and the other out of simple neglect. If he and Sharpie and the damned Western pack didn’t do anything about it soon, they would have two dead kids on their hands.  They were good kids, and he wasn’t about to lose his friends over something that could be fixed. How it could be fixed, he didn’t know. Nor how long it would actually take to do so, but he wasn’t going to walk away from them. Not when it was apparent that they both needed help badly.

Kaner relaxed in his arms, but he didn’t cry. Or at least, not as brokenly and openly as Tazer had earlier, and it made Adam wonder if Kaner was so numb and dead inside that he _couldn’t_ cry anymore. Kaner was the most ebullient person that he had ever known. Yes, he was annoying as hell sometimes and reminded Adam of a hyperactive eight year old on too much sugar, but he accepted it because it was just who he was. The hyperactivity, the impulsivity, the awkwardness and occasional obnoxiousness...all of it combined with the most loyal, and kind and compassionate soul he’d ever met...that was _Kaner._ If one or all of those pieces were gone...what was left?

“Bur...Bur...Could you let go a bit? I can’t breathe.” Kaner gasped out, bringing him back to the present and to the realization that he was nearly crushing Kaner in his agitation.

“Sorry. Christ, I didn’t realize it.” Adam apologized as he let go and backed away a bit to give the poor kid some breathing room. Kaner smiled weakly as he stretched out his shoulders and looked up at Adam.

“It’s okay. I just...” Kaner looked away, turning his face so that Adam only got a view of the still bandaged right eye. The right corner of Kaner’s mouth twitched before he took a deep breath and continued. “I haven’t been held like that in a long time. I just wanted to enjoy it for as long as I could.”

Adam himself had to look away and bite his lip hard to keep from bawling in front of Kaner. He was supposed to be the strong one in this equation despite not getting notice of it earlier, and he was going to try his best there. Even if it meant asking questions that he’d rather not have the answers to.

“It’s not that he’s mean, or anything like that. It’s like he’s afraid of hurting me. He used to hug me, when we had gotten home. But now...he just doesn’t even try anymore. He just let his fear take over and it fucking sucks. He’s so busy trying to fix me that he doesn’t even see _me_.” He sighed and turned his face so that he was looking at Adam, his eye now a dull slate blue. He wasn’t _quite_ looking at Adam with pleading in his face, but it was close enough, considering his emotionally dull state at the moment. It was that and the way that Kaner cradled his braced, useless left arm that prompted Adam into action.

Adam pulled his phone out of his pocket and scrolled through the contact numbers before he punched   the speed-dial.

“We’re going to take care of you and Tazer, Kaner. Don’t worry.” He found himself saying as he waited for the call to connect. Kaner only gave him the briefest of smiles that he returned, but lost quickly when the call was picked up and he moved to the unused living room.

~*~*~*~

“Hello?” Sharpie whispered into the phone, running his hand over his bleary face. It was his day off and he had been celebrating it by sleeping in. Jonathan had already gone to work at the cafe, since it was his week of early shifts.

 Although his self-released cd was bringing in a decent amount of cash and his trust-fund from his father had kicked in, Jonathan still enjoyed working at the coffee-shop. It had, after all, given him a new start when he had been still raw over the events of the November war and when the relationship with Sharpie was so new and delicate. He wasn’t going to bail out on it. Besides, he really liked the atmosphere and Sharpie really liked the occasional desserts that Jonathan brought home.

But now, he was dragged out of sleep by...he pulled his mobile from his ear and saw it was Bur’s number on the display. He frowned and tried to shake off the vague irritation he felt at the call. He wasn’t averse to having Bur calling him. After all, they were roomies and good friends. But when it came to his sleep getting interrupted...he wasn’t as forgiving to his friends or enemies.

“Hey Sharpie, you got a few minutes?” Bur asked his voice unusually sombre. Although he was pissed, he let it go pretty quickly. Bur was usually quite upbeat and to hear him sound like that meant something was more than not okay.

“Yeah, I do, Bur. What’s up?” Sharpie asked as he rubbed the sleep out of his eyes in an attempt to fully wake up.

“I’m at Tazer and Kaner’s and we gotta do something, Sharpie.” Bur answered, his voice taking an edge of panic as he spoke. “It’s not good. Tazer’s this close to having a nervous breakdown and Kaner’s just wasting away, emotionally and physically. We gotta do something before they end up like those people from “Ethan Fromme”. Have you ever read that book? It’s fucking depressing. I still don’t get why they made kids read that in school...”

Sharpie closed his eyes and groaned softly. This wasn’t what he needed to hear when he first opened his eyes. He let Bur babble on for a few minutes as he made plans. Yeah, he was still pissed off about Minnesota, but he was also adult enough to stop being petty and help out his friends when the need was dire. And if Bur was babbling, then there was no doubt about it that shit had just gotten serious.

“Bur, Bur. Shut up and no, I didn’t read it. Canadian, remember? We had to read crap about the Prairies during the depression and that was as bad or maybe even worse. But that’s neither here or there. Give me half an hour to come up with something, all right?” Sharpie asked as he got out of bed and ran into the bathroom to assess how much time he was going to need to get presentable and to make the phone calls he knew he was going to need to make.

Bur exhaled before he agreed. “All right, then. I’ll keep the brat entertained until you get here.”

Sharpie smiled a bit at the attempted bravado. He knew that Bur was doing the best he could and that was more than he could ask for, since Bur did have a reputation for being as sensitive as a brick.

“Sounds good. I’ll see you in a few, all right. Take it easy.” Sharpie waited for the mumbled confirmation before he ended the call. He put his mobile on the counter and jumped in the shower without giving it a second thought. 

Once he was clean and dressed and had left a note for Jonathan, he picked up his mobile again and speed-dialled a number he never thought he would have dial under these circumstances again.

“ _Oui, Allo?”_

~*~*~*~*~

Jose sat on the corner of his hotel bed, blinking at the neon green numbers on the digital alarm clock before he finally stood up and went to the window. Although life wasn’t overwhelmingly good or bad at the moment, he wasn’t exactly feeling upbeat at the moment. He knew he was just in a mood and that it would pass, but it still made him vaguely uneasy and with a vague sense of foreboding on top of that. Something was coming, and he just hoped that it was at least something positive. It had been awhile since they had gotten some good news.

“Probably not though.” He muttered to himself when he looked up at the mercury grey sky that blanketed the Montreal skyline. He sighed heavily and walked away from the window, letting the drapes fall shut behind him. He scratched his scalp and walked towards the bathroom. Although morning skate was optional, he was still planning to make it. He needed the activity to focus on rather than wondering what exactly was going to come crashing on his head sooner, rather than later.

He had just gotten presentable when he heard his mobile ringing. Although he was tempted to let it go to voicemail, he just knew he was delaying the inevitable. He grimaced to himself, but answered it, figuring that he might as well get whatever it was over and done with and go on with his day.

“ _Oui, Allo?”_  He answered as he moved around the room, pulling out clothing from his bag and throwing it carelessly on the bed.

“Theo? Is this a bad time?” Patrick Sharp asked, stopping him in the middle of the room. Out of all people he had been expecting to hear from...Sharpie probably was the last one on the list. That made him slightly worried as to why Sharpie would be calling him so early in the morning. But it also eased the foreboding that had been crowding him since he had woken up. Thank God for small blessings and all that.

“No. I can spare a few minutes to talk. Why?” Jose asked as he sat down on the bed and pulled his boxer shorts on. Sharpie sighed heavily in reply before he started to speak.

“You know what we spoke about, before?” Sharpie blurted out and fell silent the minute he got the words out.

“What exactly was that?” Jose asked slowly, his hand stilling on his jeans as he tried to get his mental bearings back after the abrupt way that Sharpie started the conversation.

“During Minnesota.” Sharpie replied softly. Jose swallowed hard at the answer.  He understood now, what Sharpie was alluding to. He had known that it was bound to come to that. But he never believed that it was going to come so quickly.

“Why now?” He asked in a voice that was hardly more than a whisper.

“Adam just called me from Jonny’s house and it’s bad.” Sharpie explained tersely.

Jose swore softly in French. “As bad as Jonathan was?”

“Maybe even more than how he was. Adam’s got the emotional depth of a rock under usual circumstances, and he sounded pretty frantic about the situation. I’m going over there right now to see how much damage control is needed and whether it really is time to put forth the motion that we agreed upon in Minnesota.”

Jose closed his eyes and pressed his fingertips to the left side of his temple to still his emotions.

“You know that you can’t change your mind after it’s said and done. Once you go there, you can’t turn back. Especially not when we’re so fragmented.” Jose reminded him, his voice low and harsh as he started to mentally compile the list of necessary things he needed to do now that Sharpie had called him about the Heir and his Charge.

“I am well aware of that, but this is different than before. I can deal with this better than I could deal with the first request.” Sharpie replied gravelly.

“Even if it means going against your own personal code? How will your family all feel about your betrayal? Your about-face, because this is what they will see it as?” Jose reminded him tersely.

“Jonny and Paddy are worth it, and I’ll be damned if I’m going to be an accessory to murder because of what my family wants. I cut the strings a long time ago. It’s time they realized that and in the end, I’d be a fucking hypocrite if I didn’t do this. Does that answer your question?” Sharpie replied in a coolly composed voice that belied the seething anger Jose could almost taste even over the phone.

Jose laughed softly. “Perfectly. I will contact Ryan and Sheldon and let them know.”

“You do that. I’ll drag Jonny and Paddy to our place and get it ready. I’ll send you everything when it is ready.” Sharpie told him, his voice almost back to normal when he spoke.

“Sounds good. I’ll do my part then. Say hi to Jonathan for me, then.” Jose replied, making Sharpie laugh softly.

“I will. I’ll talk to you in a few, allright? Have a good day and sorry about dropping this on to you at such a time. Good luck on your game.”

Jose smiled. “Don’t worry. It’s part of the job description and something you’re going to have to get used to and thank you.”

They both disconnected at the same time and Jose waited until the screen went back to his wallpaper: Sheldon, himself, Ryan, Sharpie, Toews and Jonathan acting like dorks for the camera at the last get together before things started to fracture for the pack.  He smiled at the picture, but nearly jumped out of his skin when it beeped and went to the message screen.

“ _Kawliss!”_ He yelped out and nearly dropped it until he saw the text on the screen.

 _“Signed by Caps. Want me 2 say hi to Ovie for you? Miss u. Call u soon, k? Luv u. S.”_

That was the exact moment he dropped his phone and decided to ditch practice that day and both laughed and cried at the same time in sheer disbelief.

~*~*~*~

When Sharpie knocked on Tazer’s door thirty minutes later, he was greeted by a much calmer Adam. Even though he smiled brightly in greeting, the worry was still there in his eyes.

“So what’s the plan?” Adam asked quietly, his eyes huge and hopeful in his face.

“We take them to my place. Get them to pack up the essentials and drag them over there. There’s no way that they’re staying here for a minute longer.” Sharpie said in quick, clipped tones that brooked no room for argument. Adam blinked at the decisive tone and looked startled for all of a few seconds before he threw his arms around Sharpie and hugged him tightly.

“Bur! Get the hell off me!” Sharpie exclaimed in a strangled voice as Adam did his best to crush the life out of him in gratitude. He persisted for a few moments more before he finally pulled away.

“Sorry. It’s just...fuck.” Adam shook his head and when he looked at Sharpie, his eyes were light silver and Sharpie felt a slight pang of guilt at having protested. Despite the big mouth and bravado, Adam was in so many ways so young. He was so uncomplicated and endearingly dense. He probably had come with the intention of visiting his friends and had now gotten dragged into something that really was way over his head.

Sharpie could now fully understand why Jonny had been so adamant about letting him sacrifice himself for Paddy’s sake. Adam didn’t really belong in their world and now he was getting pushed into all their difficulties headfirst. He swallowed hard and clapped Adam’s shoulder.

“It’s not the end, Bur. It’s looking pretty bad now...but it’s going to work out. They’ve got good friends.” Sharpie assured him as he tried to soften his reaction to Adam’s greeting.

Adam’s eyes went less silver at the words and he even attempted a smile. Sharpie felt something unclench in his chest at the sight of Bur’s smile. Like a puzzle piece that hadn’t quite fallen correctly into place and had just then fallen flush.

“I know that, but it’s just hard, you know? To see Tazer so broken up and Kaner so defeated. “He looked down then, his feet shuffling in place before he continued. “I know that I’m not the best person for this, Patrick. Maybe I’m taking the easy way out, calling you. But they’re so fucked up, and I don’t want to fuck them up anymore.” Adam finished quietly.

Sharpie swallowed hard at Adam’s words. “You’re not taking the easy way out, Bur. If you had done that, you wouldn’t have bothered to call me. Or stay with them until I got here with a plan. You’re a good friend, Bur. So come here.”

Sharpie pulled Adam into a one armed hug and didn’t pull away until Adam himself ended the hug. They stood outside for a few more minutes as they got their composure back to go inside and deal with Jonny and Paddy and the task before them.

“Tell anyone else we had a chick-flick moment, and I will kill you. Just so you know.” Bur finally broke the silence, making Sharpie laugh.

It was time to go in.

~*~*~*~*

Tazer was on the verge of waking up when he heard the knock on his door. He was still rubbing the sleep from his eyes and stretching when the door opened to reveal a concerned looking Sharpie.

“Did Bur call you?” Tazer asked before he sat up and immediately slumped in a sitting position.  He was exhausted. Despite having worn himself out enough to sleep, he was just beat. Everything was falling apart around him and he just didn’t have the strength to deal with anything any longer.

He knew that was the reason why he didn’t snap at Sharpie or kick Bur out when he should have. If he even had half of his strength, he would have just frozen them out and put on his captain face and insisted everything was fine just like he always had in the past. But it wasn’t okay. Nothing was and even though he was embarrassed to be seen so weak...part of him was glad that the jig was up and he didn’t have to pretend any longer.

The bed creaked under Sharpie’s weight as the other _loup_ sat down beside him. Close enough to touch, but far enough to give Tazer his own personal space.

“Yeah. He’s worried about you and Paddy.” Sharpie replied calmly. Tazer only stared straight ahead and nodded slowly. He rubbed his knees a few times and Sharpie just sat there and waited for Tazer to get his thoughts together to say what he needed to say.

“Did the Alpha send you?” Tazer asked as he turned to look at Sharpie.

“No. I made the decision to come here. The 1st Consort agreed with it because he’s worried about you and Kaner.”

Tazer’s lip curled up in a ghost of a smile at the answer. “So what happens now that I’ve failed?”

Sharpie bit his lip, but he didn’t look away from Tazer. “You know what happens next. But I’m not here for that. Neither is Bur. You know that.”

Tazer snorted and shook his head in disbelief before he stood up and faced Sharpie.

“I’m not leaving. Neither is Kaner. Not until I fix this. I just need more time. So thanks, but no thanks, Sharpie. But we’re not leaving.” Tazer told him coldly, his eyes flickering from dark brown to honey amber as he spoke.

Sharpie sighed as he stood up, his own eyes turning greener than their usual blue-green in response to Tazer’s sudden aggression.

“Do you really want to do this, Jonathan?” Sharpie asked in a low voice.

Tazer’s eyes went dark brown at the question and his shoulders relaxed a fraction. But tensed right back up not even thirty seconds after Sharpie had spoken.

Sharpie shook his head before he made his move. Without giving himself away, he swept Tazer’s legs out from under him, knocking the younger _loup_ onto his ass on the carpet. Tazer tried to get up, but Sharpie was too fast. In what felt like seconds, Sharpie was pinning him down. His forearm pressed to Tazer’s throat hard as a warning to not move at all.

Tazer’s nostrils were flared and he was doing his best to buck Sharpie off. But the older _loup_ stayed on top of him and only pressed his forearm harder into Tazer’s throat until he started gagging and choking.

“Get...off...I...con...concede...get off!” Tazer finally managed to gasp out in between coughs.

Sharpie didn’t. Not until Tazer’s face was almost blue and he’d nearly stopped rasping for air did he get up. He stood there, his arms loose at his side in case he had to fight again when Tazer got his breath back. But once Tazer went back to his regular colour and was breathing normally again, he simply knelt in front of Sharpie and offered him his bared neck.

“Tazer...you conceded. We don’t have to do-”

“Just fucking do it, Sharpie. You know how this works.” Tazer cut him off sharply, but his voice held no anger anymore. Just resignation at what was to come next.

Sharpie knelt down in front of his captain and friend and pulled him close. He debated saying something else to soften the blow of the situation, but there really wasn’t anything he could do to make the succession and dominance claim easier to take. He took a deep breath and exhaled before he let his mind go blank and tore into Tazer’s neck without a second thought.

~*~*~*~

“You jerk!” Taylor Hall exclaimed as he mashed the buttons of his Xbox controller as he tried to prevent Jordan Eberle from winning what seemed like the hundredth game of FIFA World Cup 2010 that they had started in their never-ending tournament of Xbox dominance. Across the room, Magnus Paajarvi watched the game with feigned disinterest, having been soundly beaten in the preliminary rounds by Jordan.

“Suck it, Hall!” Jordan crowed as he navigated Fernando Torres around Wayne Rooney to score and clinch the World Cup. Hall let out a snarl of disgust and tossed his controller on the couch. Magnus snickered, but quieted down when Hall gave him the side-eye. It still didn’t prevent him from grinning widely though, despite Hall’s eyes turning greener as the glare was prolonged.

No one spoke as they settled back to watch the video of the celebration like they always did, getting a bit of a break before they started up another game. They didn’t have a game or a practice the next day, so neither felt guilty about how late they were carrying the tournament on to.

“You want to start another round?” Hall asked as he stood up and stretched out the stiffness in his back and shoulders from sitting down for so long. Magnus had already stood up and had wandered to the bathroom, yawning loudly as he did so. Jordan also stretched and was about to reply when his mobile rang.

He frowned and picked up while Hall wandered off into the kitchen to give Jordan privacy.

“Hello?” He answered the phone and tapped the button to pause the game.

“Did I wake you? If I did, I’m sorry. But this is important.” Jordan swallowed hard at that.

“What is it, sir?” he asked, suddenly remembering the manners that had been drilled into him since childhood.

There was a soft laugh at the other end. “No need for formalities now, Jordan. You’re the heir of the Western Pack now and Regency will be set up until you come of age. The formal ceremony will be held on the winter’s Solstice. But Sharp, Gagner, Horcoff, the Consorts and myself have all accepted and signed the accords.”

Jordan nearly dropped his mobile at the news. “Thank you. I shall do my best to lead the Pack.”

“That’s all I can ask for at this point in time. We will keep in touch till then. Have a good night.”

“You too.” He disconnected the call and sank into his thoughts as he pondered what changes that call meant to his life.

“So do I call you my prince now, or what?” Taylor’s question jolted him back to reality and he wrinkled his nose at the question. 

Taylor snickered at Jordan’s expression before he tossed him a can of Monster. He popped the tab and looked at Taylor, who was grinning at him as he drank down his own can of Monster.  He had already put one down on Magnus’ chair for when their team-mate came out of the bathroom. Sure enough, the toilet flushed and water started running right after. The door swung open and Magnus showed up, his eyes at half mast as he wandered over to his seat and cracked the Monster open.

“What are you babbling about, Taylor?” He asked as he took a noisy sip of his drink.

Hall jerked his head at Jordan, who was taking a long gulp of Monster and was now blushing horribly when he realized what Taylor was going to say next

“Guess who the new heir of the Western Pack is?” he asked, making Magnus’ eyes widen as he looked at Jordan, who simply nodded until he finished swallowing.

“Wow. Congratulations. I will contact my Alpha to extend the proper pack congratulations.” Magnus offered solemnly. Hall grinned. Although he was touched, Jordan felt completely embarrassed by Magnus’ formality and Taylor’s announcement, since he wasn’t sure how he really felt about the situation. So he took refuge in the other thing that he knew best: videogames.

“Shut up and start the game, Hall.”

“Yes, my prince.”

“Say that one more time and I’m going to nail you to the floor, got it?”

“Promises, promises.”

“Okay. It’s so on! Come here!”

“HELP! PAAAV! HELP!!”

“You are both idiots and I am not helping. Now be quiet before you wake the entire building!”

~*~*~*~*

 _“Let's go out, we'll take no prisoners  
Lonely love, gotta leave it behind  
We look like a million dollars  
Every time they look at us, we'll blow their mind”-Joel Plaskett_

“So how was work?” Sharpie asked when Jonathan came home to find Tazer sulking on the living room sofa, a bandage around his too skinny neck and his fingers tightly buried in Kaner’s too long and dirty curls. For his part, Kaner wasn’t even aware, since he was dead to the world, his head in Tazer’s lap and his body almost entirely hidden by their spare black and silver comforter. Sharpie himself was sitting on the loveseat cradling a large cup of milky tea and facing the television. Adam was sitting in the corner in almost the exact position as Sharpie and even though the television was on, no one was really paying attention to it. The tenseness of the atmosphere was so thick that Jonathan had to pause and acclimatize himself before he got overwhelmed with it.

“Uh...I brought cinnamon buns?” Jonathan asked as he dropped his backpack onto the storage bench they keep by the door and held up a large brown paper sack with grease marks on the outside.  He dimly thought it looked like he was making a peace offering of some sort to the tense assembly in the living room and wondered about the wisdom of it when Adam bounded up and snatched the bag from him.

“I love you. You are a fucking lifesaver! Thank you!” Adam thanked him profusely. So profusely that it made Sharpie growl and Jonathan wonder if he should have taken the offer of going out for drinks after work with his co-workers.  He liked Bur alright, but he was a little overwhelmed at being almost leapt on and given what was more than a friendly peck on the cheek for bringing home cinnamon buns.

“You’re welcome Bur. But if you ever kiss my boyfriend again, I will skin you alive.” Sharpie growled out to an oblivious Adam, who was busy rooting around the bag for the aforementioned goodies. Jonathan looked at his boyfriend and raised an eyebrow at the threat, but Sharpie’s glower remained in place.

“Okay then.” Jonathan muttered before he raised his hands in the surrender gesture and went to the bedroom with as much dignity as he could muster. The tension was getting to him and it was pissing him off. He already had had enough of that unspoken anger when his parents had been together, and as much as he understood the circumstances he wasn’t going to put himself at ground zero and relive the stress of his childhood.

He closed the door behind him and sighed, trying to get his heartbeat back to normal. He knew it wasn’t going to be easy when they had discussed the possibility of taking over, but he figured that they were going to have more time to get used to the idea and make contingency plans.  

“So much for that idea.” He muttered and ran his hands through his hair as he debated his choices. He could stay at home and have his nerves frayed until someone (not necessarily him) snapped and all hell broke loose, or he could make discretion the better part of valour and have a relatively stress free evening with his co-workers and friends.

“Fuck it.” He muttered as he pulled out his phone and started typing out a text to Robin, his co-worker. He had just finished and was about to send it when he heard a sharp knock on the door.

“Yeah?” he asked as the door opened to reveal an apologetic looking Sharpie. He entered the room and closed the door softly behind him. He stood there for several minutes before he opened his mouth to say something, but Jonathan wasn’t having any of it.

“I’m going out with Robin and Shelby.” Jonathan spoke abruptly, but he didn’t press the send button. Sharpie closed his mouth and crossed his arms in front of his chest at the announcement.

“Do you really have to?” Sharpie asked quietly. Jonathan nodded before he moved closer to his boyfriend and wrapped his arms around his shoulders.

“It’s like being thirteen again and watching my parents fight. I understand, believe me, I understand. We did the same thing to Theo and Shel and Ryan not too long ago...but Tazer’s just so full of self-loathing and hurt and anger...” Jonathan trailed off and shook his head. “It’s overwhelming and I need to regroup and be _normal_ and figure something out before I come back to this. Because I know that they’re both going to need help figuring out how to heal and move on. And I honestly can’t do anything for them if I have to wade through all of that. Believe me, _Coeur_ , I want to help you. But I can’t take care of them if I can’t take care of myself.”

Sharpie nodded and even though he understood what Jonathan was saying, it still hurt to be left alone with such an overwhelming responsibility. Yeah, he had Bur with him, but what he really needed was Jonathan to stay and hold him and tell him that it was somehow going to be okay. He hated to even admit that much weakness even if it was just privately, but this was...a bit too much for him, to say the least.

 In one fell swoop he had taken the Regency and control over Tazer and Kaner’s destinies. He hadn’t expected it to go that fast or fall into that exact pattern, but it had and it was just fucking scary.

“I’m part of the Regency now, Jonathan.” Jonathan blinked at the words. Sharpie only glanced at him briefly before he continued. “I made him concede before I brought them here. I couldn’t just leave them to waste away, despite how I may feel about Minnesota. And I’ve got Bur here...but I really would like it if you’d stay with me tonight.”

Jonathan’s eyes widened at the quiet request. “Why?”

Sharpie looked at him straight on before he spoke. “Because I’m fucking scared, and I need for you to believe in me and tell me it’s going to be okay even though we don’t know if it really will be. Because everyone thinks I’m the strong one that’s going to fix everything and just for once I want to be the one reassured that I am doing the right thing, despite it feeling like I’m not.”

Jonathan swallowed hard, not breaking their shared gazed before he pulled Sharpie into a tight embrace. Sharpie sagged slightly in his arms and held him as if Jonathan was the only thing that was keeping him tethered to reality.

“I’ll stay, _Coeur._ I’ll stay.”

~*~*~*~*~

“Nicky? I’m home! Nicky, I brought dinner!” Alex practically bellowed into the silent house as he slammed the front door shut with his foot as he juggled several packages of homemade food his mother had sent with him. He kicked off his shoes carelessly and headed to the kitchen to put away the food he hoped would last for at least a couple of days before it was necessary to make another visit to his parent’s home.

After he had claimed Nicky and had gotten swift permission from the _Ulfric_ (Lundqvist’s brother) for them to mate, he had finally been convinced by his family that he needed a place of his own. Even though he had been reluctant to find a house for himself and Nicky, he had to admit that they had a point when they kept the entire household awake during one particularly wild session of mating. His brother simply wouldn’t look him in the eye for the next three weeks. He had tried to protest that it was just a rare heat, but the damage had been done. And even Nicky had tactfully voiced his opinion that if they were going into heat every four months, they’d better get their own place with more comfortable counters.

So they had found a house not too far from his family and conveniently located close to the Verizon Centre and things had worked out quite well. Yes, he missed his family a hell of a lot, but he had to admit there were advantages to having their own place. Like making love to Nicky on the kitchen counter at three in the morning, while Nicky howled his pleasure with wild abandon and not having to worry about waking anyone up. He loved those spontaneous love-making sessions with Nicky and couldn’t believe that he had resisted the idea of getting a place for them both for as long as he did.

Yes, he missed his family sometimes. And his mother’s cooking. He had to admit that he and Nicky were sorely lacking in that department and would have perished if it hadn’t been for older team-mates taking pity on them and his mother sending care packages on what was almost a daily basis. As was the case at that particular moment.

Nicky had, apart from his team duties, not left his office in almost a month. He hadn’t even really told Alex what he was working so feverishly on. Other than to say that he had a deadline to meet and had become even more frantic when said deadline had come and gone several times. Alex was more or less in the dark and even though he understood that this was a very important request and that Nicky would tell him in time what it all had been about; he was still sort of put out at not having his Nicky all to himself in all senses of the word. Besides, he was worried that Nicky was pushing himself too hard over this and not taking care of himself properly.

Already, Sasha and Laich had commented on how tired and worn Nicky looked. Even his game performance had started to suffer, and Alex had felt like cringing when this was all pointed out to him. He supposed that it was simply the familiarity of them living together for months now and how he didn’t really see him unless they had an early practice to get up for or to get going on the road. Whatever it was, Alex knew he really didn’t have an excuse and had vowed to take better care of his mate in the future. He loved his Nicky and he wasn’t about to let anything happen to his mate if he could help it.

“Nicky? Nicklas!?” he bellowed out a few more times before he ambled into the kitchen and placed the packages carefully in the fridge. Once he had finished the task, he went looking for Nicky, who always answered his calls unless he was listening to loud Swedish music or simply too lost in all those damned old sagas that he was in charge of indexing and coding because it was his duty and birthright to do so. He peeked into the bedroom on the off chance that he was sleeping, but all he found was the bed mussed up and paradoxically, a pile of their clothes neatly folded at the foot of it. Several suits in dry-cleaning bags had been hung carefully on the door of their shared closet, but there was no sign of Nicky in the bedroom.

Blowing out a deep breath, he went to the room that had been set up as Nicky’s office. He didn’t make much noise when he did this, having learned the hard way that a startled Nicky was not a good thing. Instead, he stopped in the doorway and frowned at the sight that met him.

Nicklas was sleeping on his desk, his head resting on a stack of several old looking texts written in Medieval Norse.  His desktop had long ago gone dark with disuse. Cans of Redbull and Monster along with cartons of Thai and Vietnamese take-away were scattered around his workspace. Added to that were a couple of half full legal pads and different coloured pens lying about. There were jump drives there as well as some rewritable CDs with hastily Sharpied-on labels.

He moved slowly towards his mate not really wanting to wake him, and he had to take a moment to take a deep breath and force himself to remain calm. He wasn’t angry at Nicky, since he understood what it was to meet deadlines and fulfil a duty. He was the Volk of his people and that was a role that had its share of crunch times and hard work. He was actually very angry with himself, since he felt that if he had been taking better care of Nicky, it wouldn’t have come to this.

Although Nicky was fast asleep, he looked closer to death than just plain unconsciousness. The rings under his eyes were so dark; he looked like he had on smeared eyeliner. His lips were chapped and his cheekbones jutted out of a face that was more angles and less childish roundness than before. He noticed this, and he had to pause and ask himself when exactly that had happened. It seemed like yesterday that he had handed the Capitals jersey to a younger, more naive version of the Nicky that was sleeping on the expensive desk.

It also felt like yesterday when he had pulled him into a celebratory embrace and had felt that even though Nicky was smiling at everyone out there, that the smile was simply just for him. Just recalling those memories made his chest ache and his guilt wash up again. So much for the promise that he had made following those long weeks after the November Wars, when Nicky had been pulled back to Gavle and he had stubbornly followed with Lundqvist’s permission.

Out of all the territories in the European collective, the Slavic side had fared better than the rest. Huet had simply never gotten back to normal. Enstrom had always been a cipher and was even more of one now. If anything was going on there, Zetterberg wasn’t doing any sharing. He always had been a _varg_ apart from the other packs, so that hadn’t been an unusual proceeding. Crosby...Alex let his mouth twist in bitter humour over the last one. Geno, as a favour, had been keeping tabs on Lundqvist’s mate and the news hadn’t been promising.

They hadn’t been then and they weren’t now. And once Alex had faced the prospect of having his mate withdraw and mutely crack and fall apart, he had made the promise that he wouldn’t ever neglect him for that to happen. He had an idea what his Nicky had gone through. He wasn’t that clueless, but Nicky himself had closed that subject and had assured Alex that he was taking care of it. The Lundqvist brothers had backed him up on that, so Alex had never questioned it.

He knew that only the North American mates had overcome their trauma. Theodore and the Kingmaker’s son had dropped out of sight for awhile and had come back powerful as hell. They had even become big players in their own right, what with Theodore and Miller single-handedly running the pack affairs while their Alpha was away in Washington and the Kingmaker’s son now being the Regent’s Mate and securing a position on the Western council as his father had done in the East.

Alex shook his head to push those thoughts back and gently placed his hand on Nicky’s forehead and had to bite back a curse when he jerked his hand away. He was burning up with fever that they both had probably missed the impending signs of due to their schedules, and Alex remembered then that there had been a flu bug going around. Most of the guys had been affected and even Laich who was usually a very stolid _loup,_ had been brought down low by it.

Alex swore softly and without hesitation pulled Nicky over his shoulder and carried him off into the bedroom. He didn’t give a damn about the other wolves and the deadlines. He was going to make sure that Nicky was a hundred percent better before he even let him _look_ at a book. He knew he had made the right call when Nicky only half-heartedly raised his head and sleepily mumbled a protest before falling right back asleep once he had settled him in the bed.

Alex moved the clothes into their closet and undressed Nicky, wadding the clothes that he could now smell the sickly sweat on and throwing them in the hamper before he pulled the sheets and duvet over his mate. Nicky moved to lay on his side and curled up his hands under his chin, looking less like a man that he had been forced to become in too short a time and more like the young pup that had slowly and stealthily captured his heart.

This made Alex smile, and he paused to smooth away some of the damp curls that had stuck to Nicky’s face before he planted a soft kiss on his forehead. He pulled away and turned out the light. Nicky needed sleep and he needed to eat. But before that, he made a detour to Nicky’s office to save anything that he might have been working on. Although he hated that Nicky’s work had contributed to making him ill, he wasn’t going to let it be ruined.

He shuffled the mouse and the screen lit up to the page that Nicky had last looked at. It was open on an email. He was going to gloss over it, but considering it was very short and from Jonathan Roy, it made him curious. Not that he disliked the Western Regent’s Mate. He was just surprised as to why he would be contacting Nicky, who wasn’t a field agent and was thus less exposed to the politics of the courts.

 _“Hi Nicklas,_

 _Thank you so much for all the information that you have sent me. I will send all that you have collected from Selanne, Briere, Vanek, Price and Casillas to Tazer once he is ready for it. Kaner is coming along and he extends his greetings, but we are still concerned for Tazer. Believe me when I tell you that I will make it your worthwhile, despite your protests. And no, please don’t think that this is a debt you or your mate has to pay to the Western Pack. It would have been a blow to your mate if you had gone. Please extend our greetings to him and please, take care._

 _Jonathan Roy, 1 st Consort of the Western Regent”_

Alex’s hands shook as he closed the email, backed up the half finished Word document and shut off Nicky’s computer.

Despite his promise, he had still been a blind fool when it came to his Nicky. He walked out of the office slowly, his hunger forgotten as he thought about all those hours and how sick Nicky was at this moment because he thought he had a debt to pay for the both of them.

“Oh, Nicky, you idiot.” He whispered as he headed to the darkened bedroom.  He climbed into bed and curled up behind Nicky, who despite his deep sleep, cuddled up to him. Alex stroked his hair gently, his chest hurting slightly at the knowledge until he was finally able to fall asleep himself.

~*~*~*~

“Morning, Bur and yes, we have coffee, before you ask. Tazer didn’t forget to make it this time.” Sharpie greeted a half-asleep Bur who had stumbled into the kitchen wearing only ratty, thin boxers with stars printed all over them. Tazer scowled at Sharpie and hid behind the Special K box while Kaner’s eyes nearly bugged out of his face at the sight, making Jonathan snicker to himself.

Bur made some kind of growling noise in acknowledgement before he went into the cupboard, got out a cup and made his half-asleep way to the coffee maker and stood in front of it. Once he was satisfied that it was working well, he grunted sleepily and turned around to face everyone. Kaner’s eyes again widened and he couldn’t help but to splutter at the sight.

“Dammit Bur! Put some freaking pants on! I don’t need to see your junk this early in the morning!” Kaner protested, while Jonathan hid his grin in his coffee cup. Despite the laid-back attitude of the _loups_ over nudity or near-nudity, Kaner still hadn’t acclimatised himself to seeing it so up close and personal.  It was still a hang-up he hadn’t been quite able to get rid of despite his transition. He hadn’t ever been one of the guys to casually sit in the locker room naked and shoot the shit, so it was pretty difficult for him to be blasé about entering the kitchen and being met with a stark naked Sharpie and Roy having a casual conversation as they got ready to start their day.

At first he had chalked it up to Roy being _French_ and that it might have rubbed off on Sharpie somewhat. He had made the same conclusion with Tazer and tried to not let it bug him so much. But when Bur walked around the house naked, he began to revise his opinion in regards to their nakedness. That had not been a day he liked thinking about. It hurt when he knocked his arm into the doorway as he backpedalled his way out of the kitchen at the sight of Bur’s bare ass.

At the memory, he looked down at his left arm and tried to wriggle his fingers. As usual, Kaner's first three fingers of his left hand responded weakly to his commands. His last two fingers only twitched slightly and although it was improvement from even three weeks ago, it wasn't enough. Despite everyone being optimistic about his recovery, he could always taste a strong undercurrent of disappointment. Especially when Tazer was in the room. Kaner tried to not feel horribly hurt about it, but it was hard to not feel as if he had let Tazer down by the limitations of his injured body.

He did want to get better. He did want to gain the mobility back. Even if it was just enough to pick up a pen and be able to write his name. As it was, he was barely able to hold a fork and had to have a brace on at all times. His wrist was basically stuck in one position but at least the constant pain that had been thrumming in the background of his subconscious had stopped. When that had happened, he had forced himself to stop hoping for more. He had pretty much given up on healing enough to get back into the NHL. It was just pointless and even if his hand and arm were a hundred percent, his eye wasn't.

He hadn't told anyone yet (although he was starting to suspect that Roy had already clued in on him) but he knew that he was permanently blind in that eye. He was, all in all, a shitty liar. But having lived with a guilt-ridden and distracted Tazer had helped him craft the lie to perfection. He didn't need to keep it bandaged any longer. The infection had long healed. But he still kept it patched because if anyone saw the blown pupil that was slowly turning a milky white that was leaking into the iris...

He remembered how much he had tried to not cry when he saw the pupil bleeding colour the first time he had gotten the go ahead to unpatch his eye. He had been excited and had downplayed the situation. In retrospect, he was glad that he did. He hadn't been able to stop himself from breaking down.

His mouth tightened at the memory and he looked up to meet Roy’s thoughtful gaze. Roy held his eyes until Kaner felt his face go hot at the scrutiny. He dropped his gaze down to the grey padded plastic brace around his left arm and hoped that he hadn’t given too much away.

 Roy made him nervous now. Ever since he had been inducted into the shadowy world of the _loup_ , Roy had stopped being harmless in Kaner’s mind. There was just the _knowing_ way that he looked at everyone that made Kaner wonder exactly how much of everyone’s secrets Roy knew about.  As a result, he tended to try and avoid Roy. Or be monosyllabic with him. So far, it had worked well. But he had a suspicion that it was just a matter of time until he opened up and spilled all to him.

The more he thought about it though, the more it seemed like a viable option. He knew it was going to happen, but Kaner wasn’t quite ready to give in to the conviction just yet. The habit of secrecy and going through life undetected hadn’t quite left him, even though they had been living at Sharpie and Roy’s (and to some extent, Bur’s place as well, since he was there more often than not, it seemed like he was another room-mate that he had to also share space with) for almost a month now.  He knew it was something that wasn’t in his nature and he was going to have to get rid of it somehow, but it was a security blanket of sorts and he wasn’t just quite ready to give it up yet.

“-short notice, but it has to be done, Kaner?” he looked up and felt his face heat up when he saw that everyone was staring at him expectantly. He had been so caught up in his own tangled and wary thoughts that he had missed the conversation that had been going on around him.

“What?” he blurted out inelegantly. Sharpie sort of snickered and Tazer smiled at him briefly while Bur walked by and bopped him on top of the head.

“I can’t drop you off to your physio today, kid. Alpha’s in town and I gotta be there, no excuses.” Bur replied, completely unfazed by Kaner’s inattention.

Kaner blinked at the news. “Oh. Then should I take the bus or something?”

Tazer scowled at the suggestion and opened his mouth to speak when he jolted and turned to give Sharpie a dirty look. He looked furious as he glared at Sharpie, but he kept silent and Kaner had to wonder why that was the case.  He would ask later and only if Tazer wasn’t in such a bad mood when the time hopefully would present itself to do so.

“I’m going to take you.” Roy replied calmly, making Kaner gulp nervously.

“A-are you sure? I mean…don’t you have to work and stuff?” Kaner blurted out and winced at how utterly lame he sounded, even to himself.

Roy smiled. “It’s my day off, so it’s not a big deal.” 

Kaner would have given another lame protest if it hadn’t been for Sharpie giving him a speculative glance that warned him to just shut up and not push the issue. He suspected that if he kept on throwing up flimsy excuses that Sharpie was going to get the reasons out of him one way or another. And if he was honest with himself, he’d rather face Roy than have to deal with Sharpie.

“Okay. I…uh…I guess I’d better get ready to go then.” Kaner agreed as he looked down at the old crumpled t-shirt and track pants that was his standard sleeping outfit.

“Yeah, considering you have to leave in twenty minutes.” Bur threw in calmly, making Kaner squawk and rush out of the kitchen. Bur smirked in satisfaction as he then sank into the now empty chair and sipped at his coffee.

“Do you think he’ll talk to you?” Tazer asked quietly as he toyed with his coffee cup.

Roy shrugged. “I think he will. How much, I can’t say. But I know he will.”

Tazer tilted his head and looked at Roy sharply as he tried to figure out the cryptic statement. Before he could make any questions or replies, the bell rang.

“You’d better get it, Tazer.” Bur told him, his tone almost dreamy as he spoke. Roy and Sharpie exchanged a look; but otherwise were unfazed by Bur’s words or tone. Not so with Tazer, who bolted from the table with alacrity and ran to the door.

“Oh hey!” he was greeted by Danny Briere, who looked pretty harmless in the morning light and was holding out a thick manila envelope out to him.

“Uh hi…what are you doing here?” Tazer asked, blinking at the cheerful Eastern Archivist.

“Delivering some information and to tell Roy that Nicky’s out of commission for a while and no one is to bother him unless they want a slow painful death from his mate.” Danny replied matter of factly, as if it was just another day on the job for him.

“Thanks for the message. I’ll pass it along.” Tazer replied slowly. Danny snickered.

“No worries. Just take care of yourself and Kaner. Omegas are always hard to deal with at first. But it’ll become easier with him. Anyways, tell Roy that’s the last of the research and hope that it helps. I gotta go. Game tonight and if I don’t get back for morning skate, I’m so dead. _Salut!”_

With that, Danny turned and left as fast as he had come, leaving Tazer standing at the doorstep with more questions than he had woken up with that morning.

He watched as Danny drove away before closing the door and walking over to the dining room table, fully determined to ask what an Omega was and what the hell Roy needed researchers for when he saw Kaner and Roy ready to leave. 

“Sharpie and Bur are getting ready. We’re going now and I promise that I will talk to you tonight about that envelope. But for now, we have to go.” Roy forestalled Tazer, making the younger _loup_ ’s eyes nearly bug out at how neatly he had been side-stepped.

“What? Wait, what’s in it?” Tazer managed to ask as a resigned Kaner was more or less being dragged out by Roy.

“Your answers.”

~*~*~*~*~

 _“Oceans won't freeze  
So loosen your heart  
Underestimated  
Undefeated in this love”-Stars_

“Hey, uhm…I hope you weren’t too bored.” Kaner mumbled to Roy once he got out of his physio session.

“What? No. It’s fine. I was just working on some stuff. Ready to go?” Roy asked as he shoved the battered notebook into his ever-present rucksack and stood up.

Patrick nodded and followed Roy out to the car. He waved at the receptionist on their way out and tried to still his rapidly beating heart. He knew that both of them were on the verge of an epiphany of some sort and he welcomed it. Maybe it was the physical exhaustion of an unusually difficult physio session that was bleeding into his emotional exhaustion. Maybe it was just the relief he knew was going to come when it was all out into the open. Kaner didn’t know for sure. All he knew was that the time he was avoiding was finally at hand and he wasn’t going to back down from it. But that knowledge didn’t prevent him from being nervous before hand.

That was the reason why he stopped beside the car and took a deep breath before he called out to Roy, who looked like he had been expecting Kaner to do such a thing.

“Can we go somewhere other than straight home?” he found himself asking Roy. If he was going to lay his soul bare, he wasn’t going to do it while risking the danger of having Tazer or Bur walk in at a sensitive moment. Roy nodded without preamble.

“I know a place where we can talk. You like pumpkin pie?” Roy asked as he palmed his keys.

Kaner smiled. “Always.”

Roy returned the smile. “Then you’ll love this place. Let’s go.” He replied as he unlocked the car and let them both in.

~*~*~*~

Kaner finished the slice of what was the most fantastic piece of pumpkin pie he’d ever had and pushed the plate away. Roy watched him and took a sip of the tea he had ordered along with Kaner’s pie.

“Was it good?” he asked the slight _loup_ , who swallowed down his last bite of pie and nodded.

They sat in companionable silence with Roy sipping at his tea while Kaner drank his moccachino with quiet pleasure for several minutes. It wasn’t until he had drained his cup that Kaner finally broke the silence.

“Does it get easier?” he asked softly. So softly that Roy almost didn’t catch it.

“What do you mean?” Kaner shrugged before placing both of his hands on the table.

“Being with someone you can’t really touch in every way. I’ve never been as lonely as I have been these past few months. Even though Tazer’s supposed to be my best friend…it feels like I’m living with a stranger that I constantly disappoint.”

Roy lowered his mug and looked at Kaner thoughtfully.

“Is that how you see it? That you’re a disappointment to him?” Roy asked quietly.

Kaner nodded and looked down at the table as he tried to prevent the tears that were prickling at his eye. He swiped at his face hastily and took a deep breath to stall the crying. He hated crying and he had been doing too much of it lately and there was no way he was going to do it in public, even if it was a fairly quiet coffee shop that both of them were sitting in.

“He won’t even _look_ at me. He won’t touch me or joke with me like he used to. He won’t even fucking talk to me, Roy. What the fuck else am I supposed to think?”

Roy’s lips pressed together before he reached over and grabbed Kaner’s hand tightly. He let Kaner compose himself before he spoke.

“You’re right. He’s not inspiring much confidence with that behavior. But he’s not disappointed in you. He’s more disappointed and angry with himself. And no matter what anyone says to him unless he accepts it and understands it won’t make a lick of difference.” Roy replied.

Kaner nodded and pulled his hand out of Roy’s to wipe away the tears that had fallen despite his best efforts to keep them at bay. Seeing him so bereft made Roy’s chest tighten. He remembered how it was to feel that way. To be dragged into a world that he didn’t understand and then to be shunted aside, intentionally or not. He understood that aching pain and loneliness. He also understood what it was to be weak, injured and helpless, but at least he had just been out of commission for a month.  But Kaner’s injuries were a completely different story all together and he hoped that all the research and information that he had received would have the final answer that they needed. Even if they didn’t completely solve the problem, any improvement would be gratefully welcomed.

“He’s always been stubborn and driven and had goals and plans how to reach them. Those things have been his security and his way of suppressing and not dealing with his feelings. He’s not used to having his emotions be the only thing he has to deal with. Especially not after he’s been groomed almost since childhood to be the Heir and that no matter how high the cost as long as it would bring him closer to his goal would be worth it.” Roy explained. Kaner looked away and took a deep breath.

“Was I that much of a liability to him? His best friend?” Kaner whispered dejectedly.

Roy bit his lip as he debated as to how he was going to answer the question that he had been asking himself ever since he had found a nearly unrecognizable Kaner in the holding cell of the Midwestern Pack. It had only been Sharpie and Theo’s calming influence that had kept him from confronting and even challenging Tazer over the callous way that he had treated his friend. All these feelings flooded back to him as he sat there, staring at a heart-broken Kaner and trying to find the words to let him know that everything was finally going to be okay.

“He never has seen you that way, Kaner. Never.” Roy answered after several moments of silent deliberations.

“Then what does he see me as?” Kaner asked harshly.

“A love he doesn’t deserve until he can make everything right between you both.”

Kaner’s eye widened at the softly spoken admission. “How do you know that?”

Roy looked away at the question. “I can’t tell you just yet. But it’s not hard to see any of it. Tazer wouldn’t be putting himself through the wringer if he didn’t give a fuck about you. And I know you feel the same way, or else you wouldn’t be hiding anything from him and by extension, us as well.”

Kaner looked away from Roy, his face burning hotly at being found out. Despite knowing that it was coming, it still didn’t ease the sting of being treated like a little kid caught doing something wrong. 

 “I just…I didn’t want to let everyone down again. My arm’s fucked up. I can’t even _feed_ myself with it, Godammit! I can’t even hold a fork properly, never mind a stick! I just couldn’t go through it again. I just…I’m sick and tired of being pitied all the time for shit that I can’t help, never mind control. I never asked for any of this! And I know I fucked up and nothing can be fixed! That guy’s still going to be dead, Bur’s still a _loup_ , Tazer’s still going to be trapped, and I’m still going to be weak!”

Kaner burst out, ripping off the bandage to reveal to another person the exact damage he had been hiding from them all and to some extent, from himself.

Roy forced himself not to react at the sight that Kaner revealed to him. Despite it being unnerving with the eye almost all white and milky and the thickened bone of the socket fracture, it wasn’t a gruesome sight. It was downright tame if he compared it to what Kaner’s face had looked like almost two months ago. But he could see why Kaner had kept it hidden, since it would be another visible reminder to Tazer and create an even wider abyss between them.

“It was all to protect him, why you were hiding all of this, wasn’t it?” Roy asked him.

Kaner nodded as he fiddled with the discarded bandages. “I just want my Tazer back. What happened…it was horrible and it’s going to be part of me forever…but I can leave it in the past. I want to move forward, but not without him.”

His lower lip trembled, and he covered his face with both hands. He opened his mouth to speak, but was interrupted by Roy, whose eyes were glowing almost an electric blue as he said everything that Kaner was thinking about at that exact moment.

 “But I don’t know what to do. I don’t know what to hide. What to tell him. I just don’t know what to do, and everyday I’m just losing hope. It’s like I’m walking a tightrope, and it keeps unraveling more and more. I think it’s time to stop being an idiot, and realize it’s all done.”

When Roy was done, he shook his head and looked sheepishly at Kaner, who was staring at him in open-mouthed incredulity.

“Sorry. I’m so sorry. It’s just that you were projecting pretty loudly there, and your emotions sort of overwhelmed me. I do have better control, but yeah... I promise it’s not going to happen again. I’m really sorry.” He apologized to Kaner, who had finally managed to shake himself out of his shocked stupor enough to finally speak.

“How the fuck did you do that?” he whispered harshly. “Is it some kind of _loup_ thing that you all keep hidden or something?”

Roy smiled slightly, but there was no amusement in the smile. “We all, to some extent, have extra abilities. Mine is some telepathy and empathy. It’s not as strong as some, but if someone is broadcasting, it doesn’t take me much effort to get information.”

Kaner blinked at Roy before he sat back in his chair, not sure how he was supposed to react to any of the news that he had received thus far. It was almost the same type of bewilderment he had experienced when Tazer had turned him in the hospital after he had woken up from his coma.

“So Tazer? And Sharpie and even Bur can do all that kind of stuff?” Kaner asked after he had wrapped his head around the idea that there was more to the _loups_ than he had previously been aware of.

Roy nodded. “There are different kinds of abilities and they are tied to our regions and who turns us. No one _loup_ has the same abilities. Bur gets flashes of the future. Theo’s an empath. Millsy is the same as Bur. Sharpie’s got some telepathy and metacognition as does Tazer. Shel’s got telepathy and precognition. My father’s got telekinesis and probability. The stronger the _loup_ , the more abilities he has.”

He tilted his head and looked at Kaner. “You may get one though. Empathy is my guess, even though you were turned in the wrong region for it.”

“Why only that?” Kaner asked, not sure whether to be pleased or deflated at the comment.

Roy smiled slightly. “From what I have read and what I’m guessing about you, Omegas are almost always, without fail, empaths.” He paused and Kaner felt his mouth go dry at what he felt was coming next.

“And you are an incomplete one. An Omega, I mean.”

~*~*~*~

“So this was all I had to do all along?” Tazer asked as he looked at all the documents that were spread out on the table in front of him. Across from him Sharpie threw a look at Theo, Ryan and Sheldon, who had just arrived after Roy and Kaner had left. Their arrival had surprised them all and Tazer had been tempted to flee until they had presented the answers he was missing in his research as well as a proposal that they had to present to him or Sharpie.

“According to all of the sources that Jonathan managed to get from the Archivists and what Theo just brought…yeah.” Sharpie replied as he leaned back in his chair. Tazer snorted in bitter amusement and ran his hand across his face roughly before nodding his agreement.

“Will you do it though?” Sheldon asked him before Sharpie or Theo could say anything. Ryan himself elected to stay silent during the exchanges since there was nothing else he felt he needed to add. Tazer looked surprised at having been addressed directly by his Alpha, but he didn’t shy away from the question like he would have before Minnesota.

“I fucked him up. The one person I love above everything else. If it means coming full-circle to have him whole again, there is no question about it. I will make him my mate.”

Sheldon nodded, apparently satisfied at the reply, before he turned to look at his consorts. Tazer frowned, but did the polite thing and looked away. He would find out soon enough what that was all about. The Alpha and the consorts would tell them all soon enough. After all, it wasn’t an everyday occurrence that brought the rulers of the Western pack out in full force.

“We will remain until it is done, since we need to document and induct you both into Court right after.” Ryan explained as he pulled out a sky blue envelope that both Sharpie and Tazer recognized as the formal affiliation treaty to the Western Court. The last time Tazer had seen it he had been five years old, when he had been formally inducted as the Heir apparent.

“Why?” Tazer asked flatly.

The three _loups_ though, chose that moment to shut down. All he was met with was flat green stares as the envelope was then handed to Sharpie, whose face also was immediately shuttered once he received the paperwork.

“You’ll find out soon enough. But until Kaner gets back, nothing more will be said.”

~*~*~*~

_“The night starts here, the night starts here._

 _Forget your worries, forget your fears.” Stars_

Tazer was sitting on the edge of the bed that he shared with Kaner (albeit with strict demarcation of territory) and tapped his knees nervously as he waited for Kaner to get home. His heart was beating rapidly and he had to swallow hard to get himself to calm down. He hadn’t been so nervous in ages and even though this wasn’t the playoffs or the World’s…it was still as important as those two events.

He could hear the low murmurs of the Alpha and the Consorts as they talked to Sharpie in the kitchen, broken only by quiet laughter of old friends catching up. He could have stayed at the table and joined in the conversation, but he needed to be alone as he thought about how to approach Kaner. Not to mention how he would deal with the overflow of emotions swimming just under the surface of his subconscious.

He knew it was illogical and sort of useless to want to plan all these variables out, but he still kept on doing it. It gave him the illusion of some sort of control when in reality there was none. He just had to go through with it and hope that he hadn’t fucked everything he once had with Kaner up completely. He took several deep breaths in an effort to clear his mind and tried to not think of anything in particular.

He had just gotten himself to a reasonable state of mind when he heard someone fumbling with the door. He opened his eyes just in time to see Kaner enter the room and pause at seeing him sitting there. 

“Uh…Tazer…hi.” Kaner stammered, his face going pale as he looked at his erstwhile Captain.

Tazer frowned, wondering why Kaner was acting that way when he noticed that Kaner’s right eye was unpatched for the first time since the accident and that the eye itself was a dead milky white.

Without thinking about it, Tazer found himself standing in front of Kaner, cupping his narrow face in his hands and tilting it up to look at the damage much more closely. Kaner himself only let out a soft squeak of surprise, but didn’t pull away from Tazer.

“Paddy? Your eye…does it hurt?” Tazer found himself asking as he moved Kaner’s face this way and that to take in the extent of the injury.

“No. It looks worse than it is.” Kaner whispered, his hands going up to grasp Tazer’s wrists. “I can’t see anything out of it though.”  He blurted out, wanting to get it all out into the open with Tazer like had done with Roy earlier.

Tazer’s mouth tightened at that, and he stroked the soft skin of Kaner’s cheekbones with his thumbs, drawing a small broken sigh from Kaner. The sound nearly made Tazer cry, since it reinforced how long it had been that he had touched his supposed best friend and love with any sort of affection.

“Are you mad?” Kaner asked in a small voice. Tazer shook his head.

“I’m only mad at myself. Even if it wasn’t directly, I hurt you a hell of a lot.” He replied quietly. Kaner swallowed and his grip on Tazer’s wrists loosened. He had anticipated screaming, coldness and the irreparable breakdown of the near collapsed relationship they had between them. He hadn’t ever expected for Tazer to even try to begin to rebuild everything he had destroyed.

“I was wrong in so many things. From not telling you why you had to stay behind that night. To not agreeing to turn you and getting you injured. To shutting you out all these months. Even though I was looking for ways to fix you…I still neglected you. I still took what you felt for me for granted. I’m sorry, Paddy.” Tazer got out in a shaky voice as he admitted to all he had done wrong to his Paddy.

Kaner looked away from Tazer, his eyes filling with tears at the confession.

“Jonny…I forgave you all this. It’s done and I don’t want for either of us to keep rehashing it and getting trapped in it. I just…I just don’t want you to keep grieving for who I was when I’m not dead. I’m still here. I still want to be with you. But you have to see that…do you?”

 Tazer’s eyes changed to a light gold as he bent his head, putting his lips close enough for Kaner to feel his breath ghosting over his mouth. Kaner’s breath hitched in his throat at the closeness and anticipation.

 “I do now.” He whispered before he closed the distance between their lips with a scorching kiss that left him weak kneed. Not only had it been too long since he had been kissed, the way that Tazer knew how to work his lips and tongue against his own was quickly making him incapable of any kind of coherent thought at all. The feel of Tazer’s mouth, all warmth and velvet softness was simply mind-blowing for him. He had dreamt about this for so long that it was almost surreal. It also had the side-effect of making him lose control of himself, and if it hadn’t been for Tazer’s arms wrapping themselves around him, he would have collapsed.

There were no frantic movements as Tazer kept on kissing him, his lips and tongue exploring and massaging every inch of Kaner’s own. The touch was gentle, but firm and when Tazer finally pulled away from him, he felt woozy and almost drunk. He blinked up at Tazer when that happened and ran his tongue across his swollen and surprisingly sensitive bottom lip, making Tazer smile one of his lopsided smiles.

He didn’t say anything as he guided Kaner over to the bed with slow and careful movements. Although it made him feel embarrassed, Kaner didn’t say anything to stop Tazer’s gestures. He had a feeling that if he did say anything, whatever was happening between them would come to an abrupt stop and never resume. They both needed this, and he wasn’t going to fuck it up because he didn’t want Tazer to treat him like he was as fragile as a girl.

Especially when in a way, he was.

Kaner’s thoughts stopped when Tazer lay down on top of him. He smiled at him and kissed him again, making his hard dick even harder. He knew it was digging into Tazer’s hip, but that didn’t matter when he felt an answering hardness digging into him as well. His hand ran up and down Tazer’s side until it snaked its way underneath his shirt. He couldn’t help the moan that escaped his throat when he ran his fingers down the smooth skin and tight muscles of Tazer’s body. He had dreamed about doing this for as long as he could remember and to finally get the chance to do it was almost orgasm-inducing in itself.

“Not yet. I want to make love to you Kaner. I want to see your face when you come for me.” Tazer murmured into his ear as he pulled away from Kaner, who let out a soft whine at losing the contact. Tazer smiled comfortingly before he unbuttoned his shirt and threw it in the corner. He moved down so that he was straddling Kaner and motioned for him to sit up so that he could do the same to Kaner’s shirt.

Kaner followed the instructions and soon, they were bare from the waist up and kissing again with a languidness that belied the need for them to make love. Although Tazer was nearly overwhelmed with the desire to _take_ Kaner, he couldn’t bring himself to be brutal with him. Not when he was tying their destinies together for the rest of their lives. He didn’t want this to be yet another horrific rite of passage into being a _loup._

He moved off of Kaner and lay beside him, pulling him into an embrace and burying his nose into his neck and inhaling the faint, yet spicy scent of pine needles. He closed his eyes and took several deep breaths, letting the scent of his soon to be mate calm him.

His eyes flew open though, when he felt Kaner’s hand clumsily making its way down the front of his pants. He grunted and let his nails grow into claws.

“Jesus!” Kaner exclaimed when his jeans and boxer briefs were sliced open with quick movements and the pieces thrown to the floor. Tazer didn’t reply as he did the same with his own jeans and underwear, leaving them naked and pressed up to each other.

Tazer pressed kisses to Kaner’s throat as his hand curled itself around his hard cock. Kaner let out a small moan as Tazer caressed him gently, using the precome that had leaked out of Kaner’s cock as lubricant as he circled the faint circumcision scarring. Kaner’s moans got louder and less high pitched as he circled the head and used the pad of his thumb to open up the slit.

“Ugh…Jon…Jon…” Kaner began to babble as Tazer trailed his thumb down the outside of Kaner’s cock until he had reached the soft, fuzz covered skin of his balls. He adjusted the position of his hand until he was cradling the soft weight in his palm and his fingers were pressing in the hidden skin behind it, almost touching Kaner’s entrance but not quite.

“Jon…Jon…don’t stop…Jon.” Kaner was begging his fingers digging into Tazer’s hip as Tazer’s long and clever fingers stroked that skin, making Kaner’s legs open wider to give him more access.

“I won’t.” Tazer assured him as he stroked closer and closer until he was circling around that puckered entrance. Once he was sure that Kaner had relaxed enough, he pressed the pad of his index finger to it and pushed in. Kaner squeaked at the sudden intrusion, but didn’t tense up, encouraging Tazer to move forward, inch by slow inch. Once his finger was entirely enveloped in that hot softness, he moved it around, making Kaner gasp and moan loudly when he brushed against his prostate.

“Okay?” He asked as he pulled most of it out so that he could get a second finger in. Kaner panted out something in the affirmative and Tazer looked at Kaner’s face just to make sure. Although Kaner was flushed red and his eyes were squeezed shut, there was nothing in his expression indicating that he wasn’t okay. So Tazer added another finger, inch by inch and moved it in and out and around until he felt a definite loosening of Kaner’s muscles. This, along with the high pitched cries and thrusting of his hips whenever Tazer hit his prostate were signs that when he added the third finger, Kaner was prepped enough to accept him.

He pulled out his fingers and positioned himself between Kaner’s legs, which were spread out in a welcome that was only for him. Tazer pulled Kaner closer, pushing his legs up to his chest before he positioned himself at Kaner’s entrance.

But Tazer didn’t move just yet. He stopped and looked at Kaner. Really looked at him and took in the glimmer of blue and white peeking out from under slitted eyelids, the swollen red lips and the damp curls plastered to his cheeks. Tazer then bent down and kissed Kaner. Firmly and passionately as he canted his hips and drove himself in one hard stroke.

Kaner gasped and tried to pull away, but Tazer’s hands on his shoulders kept him from moving as Tazer pulled out almost all of the way and thrust in hard again. He stopped kissing Kaner, who was looking at him wide eyed and with a small grimace of pain on his face. It made him feel guilty, but the tight warmth around his cock was just too perfect. Better than anything he could have ever imagined or had experienced with anyone before Kaner. He wanted to cry when it hit him, since it was yet another sign of how stupid and how blind he had been.

“Tazer…it hurts…Tazer…” Kaner moaned his expression panicked as Tazer pulled out halfway through.

“It’ll stop soon. Shhh…” Tazer assured him as he let go of Kaner’s shoulders and grabbed the headboard to brace himself for the next thrust.

He knew he had found Kaner’s sweet spot when the grimace was wiped from Kaner’s face and his eyes rolled back into his head.  He grinned to himself and kept on thrusting, his first few thrusts being a bit jerky and uneven until he found a good rhythm and had Kaner squirming under him.

“Ugh…Fuck…Jon…Jon….fuck me…fuck me…God…I love your cock…God, fuck me until I bleed…fuck…Make me come…make me come…fuck me hard…” Kaner babbled as Tazer, encouraged by the dirty commands, obeyed. In fact, he obeyed so well that the bed started to slide on the floor and the headboard slammed into the wall in sync with his thrusts.

“Oh fuck…Oh Fuck…Jon…Oh God…Jon…” Kaner gasped out, his good hand clenching into the sheets and the mattress so hard that he ripped them before he let out a howl so loud that Tazer’s own triumphant howl of release was lost within it. He came to himself and looked down at his chest, which was covered in Kaner’s come and then at Kaner.

“Fuuuuck…Tazer…” he whispered, his eyes screwed shut and his pulse beating fast in the hollow of his throat.

Tazer laughed softly at the reaction and leaned over to kiss Kaner. “Was it good?”

Kaner nodded, making Tazer smile as he carefully pulled out. But even then, Kaner winced and hissed as Tazer’s now soft cock covered in both come and blood slid out of his entrance. Tazer felt guilty about not using lube for the entry, but knew that it had to be done or else the mating wouldn’t be complete.

 “Good.”  Tazer replied as he laid down beside him for a bit before reaching over and pulled one of their shirts over to wipe up his chest and Kaner’s lower half.

“Hey…careful.” Kaner protested as Tazer dabbed at the blood and come streaks, wiping him clean until they could get to the shower.

“Sorry.” Tazer replied as he chucked the shirt into the hamper and lay on his side. Kaner nodded and turned his head and opened his eyes. 

Eyes that were now a brilliant aquamarine blue.

~*~*~*~*

“How does it feel to be back?” Bur asked Kaner as they got out onto the ice for morning practice. Kaner only grinned and shook his head.

“Fucking amazing.” He replied as they skated around the rink as they waited for Tazer and Sharpie to get the crate of pucks out. “I thought I was done…and it’s just…I can’t explain it, Bur. It’s just perfect. If we won the Cup, it would be the perfect year, you know?”

Bur grinned as they stopped and bumped helmets with Kaner before he was pulled away by Duncs and Biscuit. Bur shook his head and skated over to Tazer and Sharpie, who had the pucks out and the crates set aside in preparation for the drills.

“How’s he doing with the Court?” Bur asked as they watched Kaner be greeted by the rest of the team.

“Good. I suspect if he were to get out of line, Gagner and Roy would smack him into place. But everyone is in awe of him, since it’s been almost a hundred years since an Omega has appeared in the court.” Sharpie answered. Bur frowned.

“What the big deal? Does an Omega have some kind of special powers or something?” he asked.

“They’re a special kind of clairvoyant and strong with it. And when an Alpha makes one…it’s a sign of latent power.” Tazer replied, keeping his voice even as he spoke.

“Is that why you’re going to be the new Alpha of the West?” Bur asked, his eyes turning clear blue as it all sunk in at once. Tazer smiled a close-lipped smile, his eyes a clear topaz yellow as he did.

“Your invitation’s in your locker and don’t worry about Kesler. He’s going to be there. Now get your ass out there. Practice’s started.”

END.

**Author's Note:**

> Not true and has not ever happened. Done for entertaintment purposes only. Prose is the only thing I claim. Mistakes, despite proofing if they appear, are mine and I apologize in advance. Quotations and title are from-Sam Roberts, Neverending White Lights, Joel Plaskett, and Stars.


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